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Marty's "Living life in chapters" A self development blog: 5th September 2006

Marty's "Living life in chapters" A self development blog

Thursday, October 11, 2007

5th September 2006

Well I got through my first night shift back a work and I'm a little more tired this afternoon than I thought I'd be. I really felt like staying in bed, but don't want to waste most of the day, so I'm up.
My eldest has started college today and the last of my offspring finally goes back to school tomorrow. Craig started back at school yesterday. So time ahead is going to be quite peaceful in the house midday. This will be good for future night shifts so I can get some decent sleep. Work was fairly uneventful other than one of the lads coming in late last night with an injured arm. I had to call in the manager to cover the office while I ran him up the hospital. He came back at about 2am with a cast... arm definately broken... so that should keep HIM relatively quiet for a while. Another one of our lads got issued with a 28 day exclusion notice due to cumulative behavioral problems. Its always sad when this happens. Its witnessing the old self destruct button that hard to see. The lad can appeal. Its really hard to get them to do this though because its often a case of "whats the point?" in their eyes, then too late they realise the reality of leaving and regret not appealing. I really like the lad too. Still, they survive and pretty much always take some learning experience with them.
Someone sent me a comment asking why these lads are classed as vulnerable. I guess its because of (in many cases) the lack of love around them for all sorts of reasons. They get easily influenced into all sorts of negative things. Like all human beings, they want to be heard and acknowledged. A lack of love, (like a neglected puppy) often displays in disruptive behavior, but of course its much more complicated than that. I've heard some horrendous stories from some. The approach I find that works for me in most cases is to show them some respect and give them "time". In other cases of course, a bit of the old Bad Lads Army approach is needed. I don't do that, but it facinates me to watch that TV programme.

Now, a scribbling... (I'm running out of these and need to pen some more)

My first job with a shipping agent back in 1984 paid the princely sum of £3,500 per year. I did get overtime on top, but can remember being asked to forfeit some of this because the company I worked for were looking to cut the cost of overtime. (Basically, we were still expected to put the hours in and get the work done). Friday's were always the busiest day. It didn't matter what shift you were on, everyone mucked in to well past midnight, however, from 9pm till closing time was spent in the pub playing darts. This was top up time after the lunch time session from 12 till 2pm.

One particular Friday, my manager Ray spent the whole day winding the rest of us up because he was about to go on holiday for a fortnight. It got to about 6pm and Ray said he was going down to The Crown, our usual haunt and would leave the rest of us to get on with it. He had a company car which we all had use of whilst he was there so that we could get to the ferry terminal and back. You see, our office was in the town. This particular evening, my colleague Keith suggested we move Ray's car from its usual parking space in the multi storey car park right to the top. Needless to say, I drew the short straw. Eventually, Ray returned to the office from the pub about 9.30 pm and said “OK guys. Look I'm really tired and want to go home now. I've got an early start for my holiday tommorow. Where have you hidden my car?” I had, by this time gone home having started early shift that day at 6am. Keith told him where the car was, but having gone to look, Ray returned again unable to find it. Keith then became worried and called me. Ray went back down the pub and Keith came and picked me up in his car to go find Ray's car. It was of course, where I had left it. Keith took me back home and Ray got his car. I didn't see Ray for a month because I had 2 weeks holiday the week Ray came back. On my first day back from holiday, Ray looked at me with a glint and a smirk on his face and said “Right Dickerson, you bastard, I'm gonna 'ave you”. We then tumbled to the floor play fighting.

Most of the time, I did not get on with Ray. He was a very highly stressed man who had been moved from the Dover office for throwing a typewriter through a window in anger one day. He was pretty scary and we fell out frequently. I was pretty hot headed myself in those days and we had a clash of personality. I'm happy to say that there were times when we got on well.

I'm planning a return of the Colonel in a future Vlog shortly. Watch this space. I have the idea in my head. Its a case of putting it together. With some peace and quiet at home, that should give me the time.

Now for some video. The 3 Tenors on Italy 1990. Always reminds me of the World Cup. O Sole Mio.... always an uplifting song with these guys having fun with it.


(8 total)

Poor kid, hope his arm isnt too bad and its a shame about the other lad falling by the wayside. I dont know these kids stories but I would imagine that almost boy to boy they are victims themselves of lifes ravages. Lack of love or support in life must be a massive blow to the lads self esteem.

Tuesday 5 September 2006 - 04:26PM (BST)

Each time I read about your work, I think of my son, and how he is, I just don't know the answer to that one, and its hard.... I hope he's somewhere where he has someone like yourself to look over him. No one back there seems to know exactly where he is, what he's doing or anything. While I have had some problems and issues with him over the years, and the last time we 'spoke' by email he told me he wanted to see me dead, I can't help but wonder if he's ok, thats the Mum in me though. You do a great job,knowing you are sometimes making a difference to someones life...

Tuesday 5 September 2006 - 05:41PM (BST)

I think that it just comes down to "Boys will be Boys". Hope his arm heals quickly. Have a great day Martin :) Make that a great night.

Tuesday 5 September 2006 - 12:59PM (EDT)

Hope his arm is ok.

I'm more fascinated by your scribbling. So you had it out with this guy? I never got into a fist fight or a tumble with anybody after I turned 17. Mostly because I avoided confrontations. Did you deck him then?

Tuesday 5 September 2006 - 02:43PM (EDT)

No Brenny, I couldn't do that. I'd be out of a job and in the cells. No idea how he did it, but then thats just the way. He said his girlfriend did to someone else apparently. Hmmm. methinks you are teasing me again Brenny LOL.

Tuesday 5 September 2006 - 08:26PM (BST)

oops, my brain cell slipped. I see you mean't my story from old Brenny.It wasn't a real fight with Ray. Just a bit of horseplay really. Mind you, as I said, we definately didn't always see eye to eye.

Tuesday 5 September 2006 - 08:57PM (BST)

Sadly Marty I too have worked with these young people who seem to be in self destruct mode, when I worked in residential. What you said about treating them with some respect and dignity is spot on hun! because if you can see past the behaviour and attitude and treat them like a person instead of a problem, and without prejudice or judgement, then they will show you respect back and will always remember you for that. Even if you have been the one who has had to let them

Tuesday 5 September 2006 - 09:19PM (BST)

f the work force..must really have your heart stirred up...NOT!...Hope the arm's ok, and all is well.

Tuesday 5 September 2006 - 01:28PM (PDT)


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