How to organise emotional discipline

Working to support people can be hard work at times. I got midway through today and suddenly felt very fatigued both mentally and physically. Getting home from work I found it hard to focus on anything and I considered going straight to bed after dinner. 

Here is what I did.

Meditation...
I spent 15 minutes listening to some meditative music through my headphones visualising yesterdays Mind Alchemy exercise and allowed my body to slow down.

Rest...
10 minutes lie down on the bed to get a power nap before dinner.

Reflection.....
I thought about and evaluated my emotional state. I do have a bit of a cold at the moment. I didn't sleep as well as usual last night because of that. I'd also worked hard last night at the studio with the band laying down 5 track for the bands new album. The working day took its toll by encouraging a positive attitude in my clients. This can take a lot of emotional energy from those of us that do this sort of work, so I needed to acknowledge that and give myself time to recharge. 

Reading....
Once I was able to concentrate, I then read some positive material online. Seeing positive feedback on my blog lifted me this evening. It is encouraging and motivating.

Once I'd done that, I felt very much better. My mind felt creative again and I was able to think of something to write about today whilst walking down the road during the evening. 

I believe there needs to be a disciplined process to the day to ensure there is time to recharge physically and emotionally. Just having a rest in not enough. The MIND needs rest and recuperation too.

All too often, the day can feel stressful. Yes, we do need to acknowledge that, but it is helpful to seek something positive to end then day with. 


Upbeat and uplifting music.

Positive poetry. 


A comedy TV show of your choice. 

All these help to balance the day. 

I've created a taster youtube video of the work we did yesterday at the recording studio. I hope you understand why I love the band so much with it upbeat music and positive lyrics. 
See below. 

What is Motivation?

I'm looking forward to tomorrow because I will be delivering a training workshop to staff that is intended to help people become motivated. The purpose is also to propagate this motivational energy so that it will snowball to others. 

So what is motivation and how does it manifest?

Everyone experiences motivation to a greater or lesser degree in their lives. Difficulties occur when our motivation is low. Motivation is clearly linked to our emotions. Positive motivation is driven by our sense of well being and purpose in life. 

It is most effective when it comes from the very centre of our individuality and being. If we know who we are and accept that we have value, we will be able to focus on that motivation and be less likely to be distracted by outside influences. I feel certain that famous people that have achieved amazing feats have that knowledge of value in life. A typical person would be Sir Edmund Hillary who conquered Mount Everest.

Having a confident sense of personal value must surely be the key to achieving goals.

So why does our motivation sometimes wane? 

I think this is because the motivation is driven by some outside influence or source. Being motivated by seeking to prove somebody wrong may seem on the surface all well and good, however, there is a danger in this. When we come up against a challenge along the way, self talk may come in that says: 

"Maybe the other person was not wrong about me. I'm going to fail and feel like a fool." 

It is quite possible that the other person will not think you a fool at all. If we are trying to prove someone wrong, then essentially our motivation is to attempt to make a fool out of the other person. Frankly, what purpose does that serve? It certainly has some sort of negative intention on our part.

Maybe the outside influence is to try to impress somebody. If we have personal value and are at peace with ourselves, surely there is no need to impress anyone else. Self value is far more powerful than any feedback that we get from anyone else. Of course, getting positive affirmations is important because they help to build and maintain a sense of personal value. 

A few years ago, I became very enthusiastic and motivated by a business I got involved with. My motivation was driven to a certain extent by anger at having lost a job. It was my own sense of being wronged and wanting to prove that I could succeed. I got some limited success, but the driving (negative) energy source soon ran out. It ended with a breakdown of sorts where I felt I had failed. I felt I'd failed those who I love and care about. I felt that others would be disappointed by me and ultimately, I felt I had failed myself. The motivation did not come from my true self. I was even in denial about the fact I did not really believe in the product I was marketing!  

When we feel enthusiastic and motivated about something, we can choose to evaluate where it comes from. 

How much of it comes from the anticipation of receiving praise? 

When we receive praise, are we able to accept it in a genuine and thankful manner that helps to build and maintain our personal and individual sense of value?

I write about this because it is a continued challenge on the journey of self discovery, self acceptance and sense of well being. 

Be blessed folks...

Marty 

Make space for Inspiration

So here we are at all the "ones" - 1.1.11

After a late night playing our New Years Eve gig last night, I didn't get to bed until 3am this morning and I've had a lie in as expected. 

Switching on my PC, my thoughts drifted to writing a blog today. For a while I considered giving it a miss because there wasn't a subject that immediately came to mind. I just thought, if I'm going to do this, I need some inspiration. And there it was, the title for today's article. So I set about the writing, suddenly feeling inspired.

So what is inspiration?

For me, it is something that generates excitement and energy. I feel "at one" with myself. 
I feel creative.
I feel emotionally connected to others. 
I feel positive.
I feel confident.
I have clear direction and focus.
I'm far less distracted. 


Inspiration doesn't just happen. I believe that we need to make room for it. If we have a life full of emotional clutter, then it is all too easy to get distracted. Emotional clutter drains energy. Effectively, we have no room in our minds to consider how to move forward with new ideas. We become fragmented in relation to the world around us. If this is you right now or if it is something that occurs from time to time, I highly recommend that you consider taking on some counselling or therapy to help de-clutter and tidy your emotions. 


Once you have space for inspiration, the road ahead is clear. Unlike being stuck in a frustrating traffic jam, there is now room to see ahead. You can gather speed with confidence and see where you are going. The road signs are visible and you can choose your direction. 


I've drawn inspiration from many sources in the past. Some are words and poems such as the very famous Rudyard Kipling's "If". 
I've been moved by other items of wisdom such as The interview with God. 
Photographs of sunrises and sunsets such as the one at the top of this blog entry brighten my mind. 
Music, art, books, films, nature and the universe itself are all great sources of inspiration. 


We have a new year and it's always a time for opportunity. I'm suggesting that you make a decision to choose your future. Whatever is going on for you in your life right now, be aware that you have the gift of choosing how you feel about it. Seek help where you need to. All humanity is linked. We have compassion for others. It's natural. We can choose to use that compassion to help each other. If we didn't, we would simply be isolated beings with no connection to the world around us. 


If you feel able to, I ask you to consider what inspires you.
How does that make you feel?
Can you feel energy and motivation enter your psyche?
What can you see ahead of you?
What creative thoughts come to your mind? 


This is an exercise you might want to write down. Try to record your answers on a sheet of paper. See where is takes you. Give yourself permission to write down whatever comes into your mind when doing this. Nobody is going to see it unless you choose to let them. There are no rules or guidelines to what you choose to write. Even if you can't think of anything, it is perfectly acceptable to write "I don't know" or "I can't see anything". Whatever it is, write it down. By doing so, you create space in your mind for fresh thoughts. That is simply proof that it works.


I started this blog today with the thought of one word. "Inspiration". I had no real clear idea of where it was going other than having faith that as I write, I clear the clutter in my mind and fresh ideas come flowing through. 


I wish you all an inspirational, creative and positive 2011. After such a good 2010, I'm looking forward to a fantastic 2011 where I fully believe in the opportunities I have to continue to enjoy life to its full. 
Becoming more successful with my band "Beggars Belief".
Developing and designing my own life coaching material.
I can choose to develop an opportunity to run seminars on this material. 
The amazing amount of material available to read will help in my continued self development. 


Marty


Here's another guy I've found on youtube that inspired me. 





Final words, as the words of our song say "Free yourself, Freely"

Emotional filing - De-fragment your brain

The decision I made about a year ago to pay some serious attention to my emotional state and get it sorted out properly is the best decision I’ve made in my life to date.

Have you ever felt the need to shout out “Stop the world and let me get off for a while”?

That feeling of despair and confusion is the most distressing of life experiences. There seems to be no time to think straight. The mind is working overtime and causing mental and physical exhaustion. Like trying to swim against the current, it feels like no progress is being made and you can sense you are going backwards. That current is actually trying to drag you to the place you need to be. It’s probably time to let go of the fighting and “go with the flow”.

So how does this work?

The first stage is to actually go and seek help. There is a need to trust in the process of your inner self or soul calling you to let go of the fighting.  It’s a bit like maintaining the computer you are currently using to increase it performance and prevent it from crashing. We’ve all experienced the speed of a brand new computer and then notice that gradually, over time it begins to slow down and malfunction as more and more programs are added. The hard disk becomes cluttered. Other unhelpful processes get in the way, such as checking details of previously accessed programs, some of which may be of no further use. The computer processes can be cleared up by clearing the history of web pages visited that don’t need to be held in the forefront of the memory and also by defragging the hard disk.

The good news is that we can do this with our brain.

Taking some therapy is equivalent to booting your computer in “safe mode” and choosing one of the tools to make the repairs. The “defrag” option looks at all the processes and puts them into order, grouping them appropriately, discarding what is no longer needed freeing up some space. This allows everything to run much more smoothly. The human brain equivalent of a “defrag” is what I call emotional filing.

Of  course, we can’t operate in “safe mode” for long periods of time, so the brain defrag needs to be done in stages.

There are of course many other tools that can improve the computers performance, some of which “claim” to fix all problems and often simply make things worse!

What tools can we use to perform maintenance on our minds?

Taking therapy is one, particularly when things are pretty messed up. Other techniques come under what is described as self help. These can be learning some meditation techniques, taking some physical exercise, taking appropriate rest, taking a restful holiday, sharing with trusted friends, keeping a diary or journal, and many more that don’t come to mind right at this minute. Of course, once maintenance is performed, everything works much better for a while, until the next time perhaps. I’m coming to the conclusion that people who don’t suffer too much with emotional problems perform regular maintenance on their minds. This may occur naturally (unconsciously) or they make a conscious effort to keep their minds running efficiently and effectively.

Sometimes, we are not aware of needing maintenance. Again, it’s a bit like your computer that run frustratingly slowly with many faults, but you just accept its slowness and don’t do anything about it until it finally breaks completely.

Do you perform emotional filing? If so, how do you do it? What techniques do you use? Do those techniques help?

Feel free to comment.

Merry Christmas,

Marty